Some Sardar Ji Jokes

Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital. Man
says "Chin Yu Yan" and dies. Sardar goes to China to
find meaning of friends last words. It is "you're
standing on the oxygen tube!!"

A sardar went to a bank to open a S.B. A/C. After
seeing the Form, he had gone to DELHI for filling up.
U know why? Form says " FILL UP IN CAPITAL ".

A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after
every 10 sec a women gives birth to a kid. A Sardar
stands up - we must find & stop her!

Sardar: Why are all these people running?
Man: This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar: If only the winner will get the cup, why
others are running?

Sardar had twins; he named them Tin & Martin. Again
had twins & named Peter & Repeater. Again twins &
named Max & Climax.Again the same.
Disgusted Sardar named them TIRED & RETIRED!

A sardharji photographer focusing a dead body's face
in a funeral function.
Suddenly all relatives beat him. Why? He said "SMILE
PLEASE"

Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence
into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "you will go to jail".

Sardar gets ready ,wears tie, coat, goes out, climbs
tree, sits on the branch regularly. A man asks why he
does this. Sardar: "I've been promoted as branch
manager."

Sardarji standing below a tube light with a open
mouth.........WHY? Because his doctor advised him
"Today's dinner should be light".

Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He
was not sure also what to be filled in column "Salary
Expected". After much thought he wrote : Yes!

One sardarji Professor asked a plumber to come to his
college. U know why?
Because he wanted to check where the question paper is
leaking...

Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It's already raining.
Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.

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A nice Joke

Ek bar ek showroom mein salesman ke liye interview
ho rahe the. Ek ladka Bhi interview dene ayaa.ladke ko
angrezi aati nahin thi, to usko manager ne reject kar
diya. Ladke ne manager se kaha, aapko sale se matlab
hona chahiye angrezi se kya? aap mujhe chance dein,
agar sale badh jaye to salary dena nahi to hata dena.
Manager ko baat janch gayi. Ladke ko Naukari par rakh
liya gaya. Phir kya tha, doosare din se hi sale
dugani, teesare din tiguni aurr daily sale badne lagi.
Showroom ke malik ko pata laga, usne manager se
kaha, is naye ladke se mujhe milna hai. Malik showroom
par aaya, usne dekha ladka ek customer ko fishing-rod
bech raha tha. Woh door khada ho kar hi usko customer
se deal karte dekhne lagaa. ladke ne fishing-rod bech
di. customer ne kaha kitne rupaye, ladka
bola Rs.800/-. yeh kahkar ladke ne customer ke shoes
dekhe aur bola, itne mehange shoes pahankar fishing
karne jayenge? ek sport shoe bhi kharid lijiye,
customer ne sport shoes bhi kharid liye.Ab ladke ne
kaha talaab kinare dhoop mein baithna padega, ek cap
bhi kharid lijiye to theek rehega,customer ne cap bhi
kharid li.
Ab ladke ne kaha, machli pakadne mein bahut intezar
karna padega, kuchch eatables, wafer , biscuits, bhi
le jayiye, customer ne woh bhi kharid liye. Ladka bola
machli pakdenge to rakhenge kahan ? yeh ek Rs.100/-
ki basket bhi le lijiye, customer ne woh bhi kharid
li. ab total bill bana Rs.2000/- ka. Malik bahut khush
hua. Usne ladke ko bulaya aur kaha, tum to kamal ke
salesman ho. Woh aadmi fishing rod kharidane ayaa tha
aur tumane usey itna sara samaan bech diya, very good.
Ladka bola, woh aadmi to"Carefree sanitary pack"
khridane ayaa tha, maine kaha, char din tu ghar par
kya karega, Machchli pakad.

Albert Einstein

When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker's
circuit, he usually found himself eagerly longing to get
back to his laboratory work.
One night as they were driving to yet another dinner,
Einstein mentioned to his chauffeur (a man who somewhat
resembled Einstein in looks & manner) that he was tired of
speechmaking.

"I have an idea, boss," his chauffeur said. "I've heard you
give this speech so many times, I'll bet I could give it
for you."

Einstein laughed loudly and said, "Why not? Let's do it!"

When they arrived at the dinner, Einstein donned the
chauffeur's cap and jacket and sat in the back of the room. The
chauffeur gave a beautiful rendition of Einstein's speech
and even answered a few questions expertly.

Then a supremely pompous professor asked an extremely
esoteric question about antimatter formation, digressing here
and there to let everyone in the audience know that he was
nobody's fool.

Without missing a beat, the chauffeur fixed the professor
with a steely stare and said, "Sir, the answer to that
question is so simple that I will let my chauffeur, who is
sitting in the back, answer it for me."

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