• Banta:Santa where were u born?
Santa: punjab.
Banta: which part.
Santa: oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body is born in Punjab".
• Kya kahun tujhe khwab kahun to toot jayega. dil kahun to bikhar jayega, aa tera naam zindagi rakh dun, maut se pehle to tera saath chhut na payega!
• Gujju Premi: Darling mere kaan me kuch halka sa, kuch narm sa, Kuch namkin sa, Kuch mitha sa kaho!
Premika: DHOKLA
• Jeeto: U tell a man something, it goes in one ear & comes out of the other.
Santa: U tell a woman something, it goes in both ears & comes out of the mouth.
• With atomic and meteoric regards, my volcanic impulse trembles every time I greet a person with a magnitude of character and charm like you.
• Let everyday b a dream u can touch, let everyday b a luv u can feel, let everyday b a reason to live bcoz life indeed is beautiful. Have a Gud day.
• Our friendship is like playing on a see-saw, not only bcoz its always fun being with u but also bcoz I won't mind going down to see u rise.
• Look at the ocean & see God's abundance! Look at the sky & see God's glory! Look at the moon & see God's wonder! Look at the mirror & see God's blunder!
• If I'm in hell & u r in heaven, I'll luk up & b glad of u. If I'm in heaven & u r in hell, I'll pray 2 God 2 send me down coz the heaven is not heaven without U
• Eyes: To look at you; Hands: To pray for you; Mind: To care for u; Heart: To love you and Legs: To kick u if u forget me.
• Night has end for another day, morning has come in a special way. May you smile like the sunny rays and leave your worries at the blue bay.
• Come, work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.
• Some friends r worth 2b thrown, some r good 2 keep, some r 2b treasured 4 ever. I think u r the one 2b thrown in the treasure box 2b kept 4 ever.
• Sometimes my mind asks: Why I miss u? Why I care 4 u? Why I remember u? Then my heart answers: B’coz a mental patient needs more care.
• Another month, another year, another smile, another tear, another winter, another summer too but there will never be another you!
• Banta: What's the definition of bravery?
Santa: A man with a bad case of diarrhea taking a chance with a huge fart.
• If loving u is wrong, then I don't wanna b right. My luv 4 u is strong & brighter than any light. The way we must go is long, but we'll win every fight.
• Stars have 5 ends, squares have 4 ends, triangles have 3 ends, lines have 2 ends, life has 1 end, but I hope our friendship has no end.
• A bell is no bell 'til u ring it, a song is no song 'til u sing it & luv in ur heart wasn’t put there to stay - luv isn’t luv 'til you give it away.
• One tree can start a forest, one smile can start a friendship. One touch can show you care, one friend can make life worth living for.
• It must have been a rainy day when you were born, but it wasn't really rain, the sky was crying because it lost its most beautiful angel.
• Everyone wants 2 be the sun that lights up ur life. But I'd rather be ur moon, so I can shine on u during ur darkest hour when ur sun isn't around.
• A friend is sweet when its new but it is sweeter when its TRUE! But you know what? It's sweetest when its you.
• The rain makes all things beautiful. The grass & flowers too. If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn't it rain on you?
• Its true that we don’t know what we've got until we lose it, but it is also true that we don’t know what we've been missing until it arrives.
• Loving is not how u forget but how u forgive, not how u listen but how u understand, not what u see but how u feel & not how u let go but how u hold on.
• My eyes r hurting coz I can’t see u, my arms r empty coz I can’t hold u, my lips r cold coz I can’t kiss u & my heart is breaking coz I m not with u.
• Hubby: Darling, years ago u had a figure like Coke bottle. Wife: Yes darling I still do, only difference is earlier it was 300ml now it's 1.5 ltr.
• Roses r red voilets r blue, monkeys like u should be kept in zoo. Don't feel angry u will find me there too, not in cage but laughing at u.
• I want you 2 know that our friendship mean alot 2 me. U cry i cry. U laugh I laugh. U jump out of the window... I look down & den... I laugh again.
• Wife: I wish I was a newspaper, so I'd be in ur hands all day. Husband: I too wish that u were a newspaper, so I cud have a new one everyday.
• Sincere Apology: If u dont like any of my SMS n dont like 2 read, then plz dont hesitate, feel free to..... throw ur mobile!!
• I’ve written nice poem 4 you. Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.. You should Know What you R.. & Once you Know What you R.. Mental Hospital is not So Far..
• Scientists all over the world r wondering how long a human being can live without a brain... Kindly tell them ur age...
• A reasent studdi haz shon dat peepal hoo aar werry samaarat end gudd lukeeng mak manee spallings misstake... Vatt iz yorr opeeneum?
• God thought that since he couldn't be everywhere he made a mother. Then devil thought that he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother-in-law.
• Little birdy in the sky, You look up and it shits in your eye. You don't mind and you don't cry, You just thank God that cows don't fly.
• What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said "Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later."
• There are 4 animal species a woman needs in her life: Jaguar in her garage, mink in her closet, tiger in her bed and of course a donkey to pay her bills!!
• Do you take me 2 be ur lawfully loveable fren, 2 have and 2 hold, 4 rich quotes or corny jokes, in text messaging & in poor signal, till low battery do us part?
• God made Coke, God made Pepsi, God made ME, so damm SEXY! God made rivers, God made LAKES, God made U, well everybody makes MISTAKES!!
• A small kid wrote to SANTA CLAUSE, "send me a brother". Santa wrote back, "send me ur mother".
• Hearts could only love 4 a while u can put many relations in a file, u can make a desert from the Nile, but u can’t stop my smile when I c ur name on my phone.
• U may be out of my sight, but not out of my heart. U may be out of my reach, but not out of my mind. I may mean nothing to u but u'll always be special to me.
• Salesman: Sir, this computer will cut your workload by 50%.
Santa: That's great, I'll take two of them.
• An astronomer was watching the sky from his telescope. Santa was observing him. Suddenly a star falls, seeing that Santa shouted: Kya nishana lagaya hai!
• I love you more today than I did yesterday, but not as much as I will tomorow.
• U must b tired coz u hv been running through my mind, u gotta b a thief coz u hv stolen my heart n I must hv been a bad shooter coz I keep missing u.
• I used to think that dreams do not come true, but this quickly changed the moment I laid my eyes on you.
• When somebody who's deeply in love with u tells u that you're cute, beautiful and angelic, I agree. That's true, believe me, I swear coz love is blind.
• Words begin with ABC, numbers begin with 123, music begins with do, re, mi and friendship begins with U and ME!
• Faith makes all things possible, love makes all things easy, hopes makes all things work, but ur gorgeous smile brings all faith, luv & hope in me!
• Here's to the bright New Year and a fond farewell to the old; here's to the things that are yet to come and to the memories that we hold.
• Wishing u 12 months of happiness, 52 weeks of fun, 365 days of laughter, 8760 hrs of Gud luck, 525600 min of joy, 31536000 secs of success in 2005 & always.
• May the New Year bring with it new colors of joy, new hues of happiness & new tints of success. Sending u a spectrum of wishes 2 brighten ur days.
• Q: Why did Santa take his pregnant wife Jeeto to Pizza Hut?
A: Because they advertised 'free delivery'
• Friendship is an onion. It has many layers in it. Adds taste to your life, but if you try to cut it you will get nothing but tears!
• Love is painful, it is true; not to love is painful too.. But it gives a greater pain to love and not to be loved again
• Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola: "Menu koi farak nahin penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon."
• I wanted to kill the most sweetest, smartest and most beautiful person on earth. ...Then I thought SUICIDE is crime under sec 309 IPC
• I always thought loving some1 was the greatest feeling, but I realised that loving a friend is even better; v lose ppl v love but v never lose true friends.
• May the Christmas brings smiles at ur doorstep, joy in ur heart and luv n togetherness of friends n family in ur home. Merry Christmas!
• When you are counting all your friends, the oldest, the best & the new...
I wud like to stand by ur side & say two little words..."ME TOO"
• If u were going to die soon & had only one phone call u could make, who would u call & what would u say? And why are u waiting?
• U may be out of my sight but not out of my heart. U may b out of my reach but not out of my mind. I may mean nothing to u but u'll always b special 2 me.
• Luk at the world as 1 big chocolate cake. It would never be complete without few sweets n nuts. Sweet like ME & nut like U.
• Loving is not how u forget but how u forgive, not how u listen but how u understand, not what u see but how u feel & not how u let go but how u hold on.
• When u smile the world smiles with u. When u r down people’ll rally behind u but when u fart u r alone coz people'll never stand by u!
Be careful when a guy tells u that he loves u from the bottom of his heart for this may mean that there's still enough space 4 another girl on top.
• A peach is a peach, a plum is a plum, a kiss isn't a kiss without the tongue, so open ur mouth & close ur eyes & give ur tongue some exercise.
• The best gift you can give is a hug; one size fits all and no one ever minds if you return it.
• You should do two things in the morning- 1) Pray to God so you can live and 2) have a shower so others can live.
• Friendship is like peeing in ur pants. Everyone can c it but only u can feel its true warmth. Thanks 4 being the pee in my pants.
• Behind every successful woman, there is a satisfied man, but behind a satisfied woman there is an exhausted man.
• When u r down & no one is there, don't think of me. When u r crying & no one is there then too don't just think of me, call me up, my incoming is free.
• Luk at the world around u; u’ll see God's creativity. Luk at the breakfast table; u’ll see God's providence. Look at the mirror; u’ll see God's sense of humor.
• Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, small people talk about others & legends never talk, they send SMS
• Like energy, love can neither be created nor destroyed. It can just be transferred from one girlfriend to another girlfriend.
• Last night I wanted to write you a letter but all I could write was - noh ss!W ! It doesn't make sense until you read it upside down!
• Never say u r happy when u r sad. Never say u r fine when u r not ok. Never say u feel gud when u feel bad. And never say u r alone when I’m still alive.
• One day you will ask me what's more important 2 me, you or my life? I will say my life & you will leave me without realising that you are my life.
• Through each day our goal is to touch one's heart, encourage one's mind & inspire one's soul. May u continually b blessed & b a blessing to others! GUD DAY!
• Love is just like life, it's not always easy and does not always bring happiness but when we do not stop living why should we stop loving.
• Hey friend, remember that without stupidity there can be no wisdom & without ugliness there can be no beauty so the world needs U after all!
• A million words couldn't bring you back I know because I've tried, neither could a million tears I know because I've cried.
• There are Tulips in my garden, there are Tulips in the park but nothing is more beautiful than our two lips meeting in the dark!
• Friends come n go, me...??? NEVER! I'll stay and trouble you as long as I can!
• I have liked many but loved very few yet noone has been as sweet as u. I'd stand & wait in the world's longest queue just 4 the pleasure of a moment with u.
• U can b a doctor & save lives, a lawyer & defend lives, a soldier & protect lives or simply b urself, a sweet person who touches hearts!
• What's the difference between pleasure and torture? Pleasure is thinking of you & torture is thinking of you too much.
• Hi! Need one gal 2 marry... Age no bar, Color no bar, height no bar, caste no bar, but gal's father must have his own bar... CHEERS
• God thought that since he couldn't be everywhere he made a mother. Then devil thought that he couldn't be everywhere he made a mother-in-law
• A reasent studdi haz shon dat peepal hoo aar vary samaart end gud lukeeng maik manee spallings meestaikes... vaat ees yorr opeeniun?
• Life can b hard & not always fun. But as night brings dark morning brings sun. When life gets tough & no1 seems 2 care give me a call coz I'll always b there!
• Morning doesn't mean getting up & working again. It rather means GOD luvs u so much that he lets u live another day 2 do more of the gud things.
• To live this life I need a heartbeat, to have a heartbeat I need a heart, to have heart I need happiness, to have happiness I need you!
• When you are down and no one is there, don't think of me. When you are crying and no one is there then too don't just think of me. Call me up, my incoming is free.
• Those who can't have you hate you, those who have you can't handle you, those who abuse you lose you, & then there are those like me who just can't refuse you!
• A friend is 1% funny, 2% sweet, 3% caring, 4% loving, 90% good looking.
Thats why I am your friend! You are so lucky.
• I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you,
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
I love you a lot...
I love you like crazy because Maneka Gandhi says love animals !!!!
• Someday you may lose your hair, you may lose your teeth, your money & even lose your mind. But one thing you’ll never loose is your good looks because you cant lose what you don't have.
• This is to formally announce that I have started accepting Diwali gifts in Cash, Cheques, Sweets and Chocolates etc (no flowers plz). Avoid holiday rush, send now.
